One state many differences : Gods own country

Please note that these are my perceptions and any resemblance to fictitious person is purely coincidental :)


Kerala-God's own country is an Indian state located on the Malabar coast of south-west India...to me its a country on its own. Each part of Kerala behaves and thinks absolutely differently!

Kerala has three major regions : North Kerala, Central Kerala and South Kerala
North Kerala is the malabar area, Central Kerala comprises of Thrissur and South Kerala is from Allapuzha onwards
North and South Kerala are like India and Pakistan...they cant see eye to eye...Central Kerala love themselves so much that they do not like to support either part...most of the characters of Central Kerala would be inclined to North or South Kerala...however North and South Kerala's characters are distinct

There are things which are common through out but the objective of each is different, such as importance of education, traveling out of Kerala for work purpose and celebration of festivals which exists from North to South Kerala. Thnakfully objective of celeberating festivals are similar throughout, thanks to one God :)

Below are some facts and yes there may be exceptions to each but I am representing the major chunk of middle class Nair families

North Kerala men are considered to be spineless : Well I will never call them spineless, but let me tell you why this perception is made:-
In North Kerala, custom of Dowry is not practiced. Hence women are respected here..when she gets married, she is not supposed to bring anything from her place and has equal rights in a relation,hence even the man of a family treats her very well and hence she has the right to voice her opinion during any family discussions
In North Kerala, the objective of education is to gain knowledge and hence become self sufficient and run a family smoothly
Objective of traveling is for better career prospects

South Kerala : Money,money and money is what defines them...its the only priority of this region, objective of education over here is to make money!Objective of travelling out is to make money!
Dowry is practiced in a huge manner and you will see grooms working in TCS/IBM, flaunting the brand to make more moolah out of a marriage....the boy would be having high degrees to his credit, but that education does not make him wise at all, infact he uses those degrees to get a richer bride.
Its a normal custom here to boast the kind of car which a bride brings in. So you see a girl is always considered a burden in all class of this society, as after marriage one needs to send her, all draped in gold alongwith materialistic stuffs...She is the money spinner for the groom and hence is expected to keep quiet in front of others
By the way, gold is yesterdays terminology, today in South Kerala, diamond is what rules!

Some serious facts :
In a typical family discussion :
In North Kerala, though women are able to voice their opinion during family discussions, men usually make their own decisions after consulting the women. In South Kerala, even though you will not see women giving any opinion during discussions, at the end of the say its the women's decision which a man makes :)...some use of the dowry brought!

If you borrow money from a North Keralite and South Keralite, say Rs 11.50, when you give them back, NK will not bother about 50 paise but SK will make sure to get it back, if you have forgotten,he/she will remind you about that :)

When you go to a temple, NK will give money without looking at the value...but SK will surely see how much he/she is spending on God :)
Again I am sure this may vary by their class (low/middle/high), but in NK, the custom is give to God with all your heart
In SK the value is considered and if someone donates a lump sum, then he/she is considered to be great, even if he is a criminal
I have seen lot of NK's make huge donations, but they do not like to hog the limelight because of that donation

In NK, once you have a job, in the family as well, except for the elders, no one will ask you your exact salary : that is considered to be a personal thing but in SK, even an acquaintance will ask you your exact salary to the last digit

In NK, if a lady is travelling by train/bus;you will see men getting up to give her the seat, in SK, if a lady is travelling by train/bus;you will rarely see men getting up to give her the seat.
The attitude in SK is, I have paid money for this seat, why should I ever give it to someone else

Its funny, when a typical SK family has a girl child, they will try their best to marry off her to North Kerala, so that they don't have to give dowry and when the family has a boy child, they make sure that he is married off to a SK family, so that they receive good dowry :)

Language: Again there is so much of difference in one language of Malayalam...North Kerala malayalam is very polite, its like Lucknawi Hindi, Malayalam of South Kerala is completely opposite..its like Mumbai hindi, full of slangs!Again districtwise language differs.

Guess I am placing SK in poor light, but there are good sides to them also : for e.g.: they save loads of money, they follow rituals better than NK in terms of religion.The food culture is better in South Kerala, as there are loads of varieties in their cuisine.

Again when you look at North Kerala, there are different districts like Palakkad, Calicut, Kannur etc
By the way, for a Calicut person, Palakkad is a strict No-No...they consider Palakkad people to be very stingy and attitude wise similar to SK, and Palakkad people are brainy and hence consider themselves superior!
In South Kerala, you have districts like Kottayam, Ernakulum, Trivandrum etc...each one considers them to be superior.Central Kerala considers themselves most superior as they have the best temples and jewellers...hehehe

Imagine one state has so many differences, what would be the case of others....hats off to India to remain United!!!

Kerala : Some great facts

Hmm now that I am done with the irritating facts, let me jot down some great facts of Kerala!


Temples of Kerala : Superneat and Superbest
Go to any part of India, you will not get the same feeling of visiting temples as, in Kerala. They are the best, you know that the poojaari are the neatest. Something which is not prevalent in a Tamil Nadu or Karnataka.
Unnikrishnan is definitely there and watching us in these temples :)

Water of Kerala : Wow purity at its best
One bath and you feel that you have lived you life completely. The water is so pure here and so fresh. You need not worry of hair falling, as its purest water, you can drink water, straight from the well, I so love it

Having an early shower and visiting the temple here just makes the day. This is a feeling which I crave for and absolutely enjoy it, when I am at home :)

Green Green Greenery
As you travel through towns of Kerala, the sight of fields and farms are so wonderful and you just feel to Thank God immensely for his generosity!!!

Wonderful cuisine
Oh yes, as a state, Kerala is home to a variety of dishes and some of them are heaven :)

Weekend getaways:
If you live in Kerala, the are loads and loads of places to visit, so if one ignores the Kallan part, then this place is wonderful for weekends!

Autos
The autos are very cute in Kerala, it looks different, and I crave for the auto ride, and yes the autowalas are also very honest, unlike Bangalore and Chennai!!!!

Movies: Much better that Hindi or Tamil ones!
Though they dont make wonderful movies every now and then, but yes atleast there are few movies in a year which are masterpieces! Even though old movies were made beautifully but cannot write off the new directors. Movies like Salt and Pepper, Pranayam, Thanmatra are sooooo beautiful...can watch them zillions of times!


Yes Jewellary would be everyone's favourite but since I am not much into it, its not in my list!

Well I am thinking hard hard and hard, but am unable to find any more great facts :( Me bad!!!

Kerala : Some irritating facts

I am in Kerala now, and yes let me jot what I like and hate about Kerala land...Let me first jot down what I hate, so that I am out of those yucky feelings!Will give you examples for each

1.   Invasion of Privacy,Invasion of Privacy,Invasion of Privacy!

Hate it to the core, why are everyone bothered about everyone else's life???

In my in-laws place, one of their family person is worried about my second cousin who is not married yet! Hulo??? Go get a life!

Marriages and Funerals are wonderful to them, as they can meet long lost friends and find out if that cousin of theirs got married!

2.   Fair vs Dark

Oh yes being fair, both for men and women. Someone being fair is equivalent to beautiful. I have seen so many dark people here who are so beautiful, but nah for junta is fairness which counts!!! 

3.   Serialaaya Namah

People adjust their work from their 7 to 10 slot. During these times, unlike other part of India, where we go out or meet friends, in Kerala, majority of people are shut behind doors to watch SERIALS...Serials which represents men domination and women stupid!In fact there was a discussion at my friends place yesterday

Friends grandma : Do you think she will commit suicide?

Friends Grandpa : Hope not, afterall she has always made decisions with her mind

I am clueless and my friends sheepishly says, "Well, they are talking about a serial"

By the way even kids have no choice in such cases, they also watch those serials with terrible and dirty language. There are no parks in Kerala and hence they don't have this concept of going for walks in the evening, the excuse they give is arre, the roads arent good and there are so many thieves...its unsafe. Poor kids they are always glued to Television,laptops and play stations and the perception is Kids in metros are addicted to Television!!!

4.   Thieves,thieves and Thieves

This concept is exclusive to Kerala.....people stay in huge houses, whether they can afford or not and then never go for vacation as there are kalamaars uff thieves everywhere!!!

Dont sleep near the window, your necklace will be snatched!

Dont go for early walks you necklace will be snatched!

Dont keep the terrace door open, things will be snatched!

Even if they go for a trip they will make sure to come back in a day or two, so going out during weekends is a strict no-no

5.   Lack of kids : well innocent kids

I fail to speak to kids who are innocent in Kerala. Cant blame them, since they are exposed to violent movies and serials, they speak the same language! They say a Poda and shit frequently and when they say such sick stuff, instead of getting a slap, everyone in the family smiles, as though he has achieved something!

And yes these kids are very very indisciplined!miss innocence in kids!

Kids : Taking care is a burden

You will see kids on their own, they grow up on their own. During holidays, they will be in front of tv or laptops. They will be placed in some school for some hours as at home, elders don't have the strength, mum,if she is a housewife, she has to cook and if its a working women, then its just not possible, so who is going to take care of them. By the way if the house has a fulltime maid then the reason given is lady cant cook and look after  kids na!

6.   Only secrets can make/break a relation!
My cousin knows a secret about her friend...so whats the big deal, she wants to share with me. I told her that I dont care and dont want to know but she still spilled the beans, it was a silly thing which cannot even be called a secret. Now she doesn't want me to share with anyone...hahaha, why doesnt she understand that I really dont care about that friend, she is not anything in my life!When I told her that she said but my friend stayed in your place for a day...so what whats the big deal, they are many acquaintances who have stayed in our place, that doesnt mean each of them is my bumchum!!!And then she says what if you meet her somewhere in life...why doesnt she understand she is just an acquaintance to me!!!"Grrr"

7.   Sex deprived?

Most of the ladies, I meet, seems to be sex deprived, or why would would they tell me about their sex life and their fascination towards manly and hairy men..ugh...please remember, I would not even had broached the subject. "Poor me..Sigh". 

8.   Men dominating : Ladies please stay @home!

Yes men in this part are theee MAN of the house. Heights is when there is a family, husband has gone to Australia for an onsite project, Wife is working and they have a son, say who is 9 years old. Typical remark of elders are Thank God they have a son to look after her. Its hilarious, is he the one buying veggies or submitting bills, he has no clue about all that, then on what account are such remarks made!Yes because of his gender.

In a typical family life, man can leave the house and come back anytime, but a lady cannot walk after 7...well it is scary, in Bangalore, I would go for shopping at 7 but in Kerala even when I go for a walk with my hubby, it give me jitters, as you see people drunk and staring at you and all you can think is, "tere ghar me maa behen nahi hai kya?"

9.   "Status" is the word!
Even if the child has no clue of M.B.B.S, he or she has to get this degree, not because of a noble career but for the status of parents. There are only two kinds of career recognized in Kerala : Engineer and Doctor. Only a handful thinks of a career beyond them. By the way, the maximum nurses are because they could not make it through M.B.B.S degrees. Those who have opted for other professions would have faced criticism from people atleast once.
A huge house, a grand wedding, even a microwave oven is bought for the status of the family.Poor microwave, it will be lying in one corner of the kitchen, and if its used, its used only for warming stuff...hahaha
By the way, even doing something for the poor is marketed here, I have never understood as to why an elephant in gold is donated to a temple, and when its given the family makes sure that eveyone around knows it...well what will the gods do with it!No clue
Even if they are giving something to the poor, they make sure that everyone is told so..you see thats their STATUS!!!

10.   Finally the worst : CRIB,CRIB AND CRIB

Typical scene in Kerala : son is a doctor, daughter is an engineer, daughter is getting married to a doctor,they live in a big independent house...but the family is cribbing, as they don't have enough money. Excuses they provide are they bought the MBBS seat for 40 lakhs, engineering seat for 30 lakhs and now have to give dowry to the doctor son-in-law!

Oh by the way, in Kerala there is nothing beyond doctor and engineer, you will get a match if you are one of them, no matter how you look and whether you are employed

Any house you visit is cribbing either about the past or about future!!! I am talking from a day to day life!

Yes in special occasions, like a marriage in the house, there is enjoyment, nahi tho they are just blaming their life!!!I pity them!

This factor is the most irritating part of a typical Kerala family, very few of them have feelings of gratitude in life!!!

10.   Other irritating facts:

• When they meet a NRK kid, first thing they will ask is Malayalam ariyo? If he/she knows, then the parents are safe, if not thenm tho gaya, you will get all sorts of lectures to learn mother tongue and the funny part is these lectures will be given by people who would have forced one to get out of Kerala!!!
• Its a perception in Kerala that NRK's are enjoying their life, well they have their weekends off but they don't see the hard work which goes behind a NRK life. Well what I see is attitudewise,  NRKs are better off
• They distinguish NRK of India and NRKs outside India :) hahaha...for them being a NRK outside India are more distinguished 
• If you are living in places like Tamil Nadu, Karnataka,they may not tell you  on your face, but they feel that Kerala is a class higher then these places, though they may have put their children for MBBS/Engineering in these places, afterall you can buy seats in these places na...oh by the way Chennai and Bangalore is an exception to this perception
• And they crib crib and crib!!!

P.S-When we come to visit Kerala, first two days, my hubby would say its too hot, then third day he would say, lets shift to Kerala, say Cochin, it isnt that bad, and after 5 days he says, lets go back to Bengaluru and I say a silent prayer of Thanks to someone up there :)